He locked eyes with her then; and behind the ever-present electricity, he saw, to his horror, a look of fear, almost like a look of pleading. Her eyes bored into his. Don't say it, they said.
But it was love. He knew it. Did she? He watched the fear push itself to the forefront. It encased her love, encased her, trapped her away from him. But he could still see her, dancing and sparkling in her prison. Couldn't she feel it?
redolent : passion :: juried : love <---- is this correct? I really truly hope not
wow brilliant writer amazing
i think there’s an incomplete metaphor or whatever, in that “pushing to the forefront” doesn’t then suggest “encasing” something.
it’s a separate sentence tho. i think if u just add something that suggests it slithering